Thursday, December 22, 2011

Got Snow?

I used to take pride in my chosen breed of sled dog by saying: "if you fall off a sled, powered by Siberians or Alaskans, the dogs will delight in the lighter drag, pick-up speed, and take off for the horizon (been there-done that). Chinooks however, will come back and give you kisses as you try to get up and dust off. You may end up with a huge tangle of harnesses and lines but you still have your sled."

I am not so sure that is still true with Team Nookies.

The PNW is almost a month into very cold, foggy but otherwise dry weather. In preparation for the day when we finally get snow in the mountains, I have been daily running the dogs with the rig. Our drive is 1/2 mile with three steep hills. Today was the first time I did not have to assist the dogs on the hills. Today was also the first time the dogs have taken off without me. I had left them in a stand-stay and the rig brake locked on when I went across the road to the mail box. Before I could get back, they had the rig turned 180 degrees and were running back down the hill. Fortunately the brake held good enough to keep the rig from overtaking them. Paper in one hand and mail in the other, I ran a 100 yard dash after them yelling "whoa!" "stop!" Only when they were part way up the next hill did they pause long enough for me to jump on.

No pictures. We were going too fast and I was trying to keep the rig upright.

Weary of week after week of cold fog and bare ground, I went in search of snow rituals.

Snow Ritual #1: Wearing Your PJs Inside Out
And backwards. This snow ritual encourages everyone in the household to spend an evening in their favorite PJs and turn them inside out. This is meant to confuse the snow gods in some strange, very strange way and prompt them to deliver a blanket of snow for the participants.

Snow Ritual #2: Leaving a Spoon Under the Pillow
Putting a spoon under the pillow is a longstanding superstition that dates back to the days of the Pilgrims. It's a superstition that still lingers in the Midwest and Eastern states, and many people follow it religiously each winter season.

Snow Ritual #3: Flushing Ice Cubes Down the Toilet
This snow ritual is meant to signify a 'cold front' to the snow gods. Apparently they'll get the message through the sewer system and (hopefully) take action immediately.

Snow Ritual #4: Running Around the Table Five Times
It's difficult to determine if you need to do this clockwise or counterclockwise, but five seems to be the magic number for the snow gods to pay attention. Four times just won't cut it, and six may be far too many (you might encourage a tsunami instead). Just be careful that you don't knock your knees on the table's edge while doing this.

Snow Ritual #5: Repeating a Snow Chant
There is limited information on what this magical snow chant may be, but it's likely a variation of the classic 'Let It Snow!' song of the season. Snow lovers in Michigan get busy singing the 'Heikki Lunta' song, a tribute to the snow god Hank Snow.

Make It Snow
By Derrell Syria
Make it snow, make it snow.
Come on, Heikki Lunta, do a little dance in the ten below.
Miss La NiƱa, let the cold wind blow.
Together with Heikki Lunta, lay down a blanket white with snow.
Make it snow, Heikki Lunta.

You may develop your own snow chant and just keep repeating it until you see those flurries-or the neighbors make a formal complaint.

Snow Ritual #6: Throwing Ice Cubes Into the Tree
Grab a few bowls of shaved ice and sprinkle them on trees and bushes around the yard. This ritual is meant to encourage a big freeze, and send a 'cold message' to the snow gods as a prompt.

Snow Ritual #7: Hop and Scatter
Go outside and hop around a tree three times on one foot and then scatter ice cubes sprinkled with cocoa powder at the trunk. - Sacrifice chocolate?

Ready to play snow conjurer?
Try any or all of these rituals. We are in dire need of the white stuff . Just don't try them all at once, or you might really confuse the snow gods for good.